How Might We...
A Core Method to Understanding Challenges and Opportunities
How Might We (HMW) is a framing technique commonly used in design and innovation to turn problems or insights into open-ended questions that:
Encourage exploration of new possibilities
Invite collaboration
Reframe perspectives
It is a powerful, versatile technique that can be used across different points in the design process. For many designers, this technique has become a default mindset whenever they need to shift their focus from problems to possibilities.
It is common for many of us to get caught in binary thinking, where we see only two extreme options, and rarely pause to explore the possibilities in between. Just as often, we dismiss those in-between possibilities without much exploration, by assuming that they’re not going to work. These thoughts might sound like:
“If I don’t punish her, she’s not going to learn”
“If I don’t sit with him to make sure he studies, he is going to fail.”
“If she doesn’t get into the right university, it is going to be very hard for her to succeed.”
Without awareness, this pattern can quietly shape how we make decisions and shut down communication with the people who matter most. Over time, it can leave children or partners feeling judged, blamed, or ‘not good enough’.
By consciously applying HMW in its most basic level in our daily thoughts and response we can:
Shift from judgement or blame to curiosity
See more possibilities beyond either/or
Create a safe and inclusive space for everyone to contribute
Put ourselves in an active role towards solutions
This is especially helpful in families where children feel controlled by their parents and resist directions. Actively using HMW shifts the dynamics of the relationship. Instead of telling them what to do, we are inviting them to come up with their own ideas. This gives them a sense of ownership, reduce defensiveness and might just lead to more creative and effective solutions.
Things you’ll need to start
All items optional
This technique works as a casual conversation or as a mindset shift. But if you are using it to explore a specific topic together as a family, it will be useful to have:
Plain paper / Sticky notes
Pens or markers
Quick Guide with Examples
BASIC LEVEL
Goal: Shift from finger-pointing to collaborative problem solving.
Method:
Start by identifying the challenge objectively, followed by a ‘How Might We…’.
Examples:
“I often hear both of you complaining of unfairness during clean-up time. How might we make clean-up time feel fair so you don’t end up fighting?”“You have been late for school twice this week. How might we make the mornings less stressful and hectic so you can get to school on time?”
“I notice we all have been spending quite a bit of time on our screens on weekday evenings. How might we take control of our screen time usage so it feels more balanced?”
Notice how the ‘we’ in the question instantly puts us on the same team, no matter who had started the problem. This does not mean that we have to actively involved in the solutions that we decide, but it sends a clear message that we are willing to pitch in to the solution, because we’re in it together.
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ADVANCED LEVEL
(15 to 30 mins; writing materials required)
Goal:
Use what you already know to reframe the problems to help us see more possibilities. This often works best when paired with 5W1H, a core method for understanding. These two techniques are complimentary, and often paired together.
Method:
Break down your current understanding of the topic into Who, What, When, Where, Why, How, using the ones that are relevant.
Spend between 5 to 15 mins creating multiple “HMW” statements using different combination of the details.
Select the best ones for ideation.
Example:
Who: Leo, Theo, Mom, Dad
What is the problem: Mess after play, lost time on weekends, nagging, frustration
What is the ideal state: Not spend majority of weekend cleaning, not nag or be nagged, spend as little time as possible, do as little as possible
Why is this happening: Clean up is boring, takes too long, too hard
When does this happen: Every day, especially weekends
Where does this happen, How often: At home, every day
HMW help the both of you clean as you go, so our weekends are free for fun stuff?
HMW make clean-up faster so our weekends are free for fun activities?
HMW make clean-up time enjoyable so we all are happy to do it?
HMW make our home feel good so it is enjoyable for everyone?
HMW make cleaning up fun feel more like play, so they don’t pile up in the weekend?
Note: It is normal for some statements to sneak in solutions (like clean as you go). Just park those in a ‘solutions’ list for later, then reword the HMW statement to stay open-ended if needed. With younger kids, it’s fine to let it slide. But with older kids, or when working on more serious or weighted topics, try to avoid embedding prescriptive solutions.
Tips when applying this at home:
Actively use it in relevant everyday situations
The more we hear it, the sooner becomes natural for us to shift from blame, or helplessness to collaborative problem solving.Reward new perspectives, not quality of ideas (yet)
Discussions will naturally lead to idea-sharing, but avoid ending the session with critical judgement of those ideas. Celebrate every contribution even the silly ones to keep the flow.
Related Posts
Understand the thinking behind these tools in Human-centered Design.
More Tools & Methods in Family Toolkit, Tools & Methods for Understanding.
I will be sharing more about this technique in future posts so you can see how it works across different context. Subscribe and follow along for more tools, methods and mindsets as you design your family culture.